Don’t buy a house, buy a neighbor.
Don’t Tell a Lie
She sat in a hammock and strummed her guitar.
He sat down beside her and smoked his cigar.
He told her he loved her and oh, how he lied
She told him she loved him but she didn’t lie.
They were to be married but she up and died.
He went to the funeral but just for the ride.
She went straight to heaven and flip-flap she flied.
He went to the hot spot and pf-ft he fried.
The moral to this tale is “Don’t Tell a Lie.”
A great man is one who, when confronted with contrary facts, is willing
to change his mind.
When I see (says Warwick in his “Spare Minutes”) leaves drop from their trees in the beginning of autumn, just such, think I, is the friendship of the world. While the sap of maintenance lasts, my friends swarm in abundance; but, in the winter of my need, they leave me naked. He is a happy man, that hath a true friend at his need; but he is more truly happy, that hath no need of his friend.
Qualifications for a Good Secretary
She must look like a girl, think like a man, act like a lady, and work like a dog.
What’s in a Name?
Terlemezian: Turkish in derivation, identified as a descriptive term, terlemez is literally defined as “does not sweat.”
However, Arpi Haroutunian, Dajad Terlemezian’s granddaughter, informs us that her grandfather explained to her how the name came about. His ancestors from Van were advisers to royalty, and the symbol of their sagacity was the long hair that they displayed. Thus they were referred to as talamazi, which, it is conjectured was a truncation of talarmazi, where talar, in Armenian, is defined as verdant, and maz as hair.