An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.
Success or Failure?
The nineteenth-century naturalist, John Muir, the planet’s first ecoactivist, hiked through thousands of miles of American back country, lobbied feverishly for wilderness preservation, and published classic descriptions of Yosemite Valley and the national parks. His contemporary, railroad baron E.H. Harriman helped to subdue Muir’s verdant paradise with networks of steel and in the process accumulated one of the greatest personal fortunes of the Gilded Age. He could have bought and sold Muir twenty times before breakfast, but to Muir this was a sign of failure, not success. In true Thoreauvian fashion, Muir once grinned, “I am richer than E.H. Harriman. I have all the money I want and he doesn’t.”
I LOVE ME, VOL.I
Teacher (pointing at a deer in the zoo); Aram, what is that?
Aram: I don’t know.
Teacher: What does your mother call your father?
Aram: Don’t tell me that’s a louse!
A Fitting Toast
Here’s to our brand new graduate—may he always remain in a class by himself.
Edo: I won a prize in a recent contest for bashfulness.
Bedo: What was the prize?
Edo: I don’t know—I was too bashful to go up and get it.
What’s in a Name?
Selimian; Turkish in derivation, borrowed from Arabic, salim, and identified
as a descriptive term, selim is defined as safe, sound, while salim is defined
as immaculate, spotless, pure, free