Uncle Garabed’s Notebook (Nov. 19, 2016)

Occult Exposure

Mockery is at the heart of Satanism.

…Michael Hoffman


In and Out

In the ranks of our Armenian organizations, there are a significant number of self-promoters who know how to talk themselves in. Unfortunately for them, they don’t know when to stop, and eventually talk themselves out.


Subtle Alternative

The matron asked the pretty young thing at the information booth of a department store to direct her to the perfume counter. “Just walk this way,” she said, taking the lead. “Humpf!” the matron said, “if I could walk that way, I wouldn’t need perfume.”


Legal History

A federal court case concerned the attempt to cancel the citizenship of an Armenian on grounds that he did not meet the legal requirement of being a free, white person. See: http://www.leagle.com/decision/19259256F2d919_1595/UNITED%20STATES%20v.%20CARTOZIAN


A Matter of Semantics

Edo: I heard you tell Ouspo that your father was in the CPA business. How can that be? He barely finished high school.

Bedo: That’s true. What I meant by CPA was Cleaning, Pressing, Alterations.


What’s in a Name?

Bezirganian: Turkish in derivation, identified as an occupation, bezirgan is defined as a merchant, peddler.


Immortal Dialogue

U.G.’s Column: I don’t see my brother column across the page. What happened to it?

U.G.: It is now appearing in The Divine Gazette.

U.G.’s Column: Will we get to see it?

U.G.: Some day, when your author joins Tom Vartabedian in the hereafter.

'I don’t see my brother column across the page. What happened to it?'
‘I don’t see my brother column across the page. What happened to it?’


CK Garabed

CK Garabed

Weekly Columnist
C.K. Garabed (a.k.a. Charles Kasbarian) has been active in the Armenian Church and Armenian community organizations all his life. As a writer and editor, he has been a keen observer of, and outspoken commentator on, political and social matters affecting Armenian Americans. He has been a regular contributor to the Armenian Reporter and the AGBU Literary Quarterly, “ARARAT.” For the last 30 years, Garabed has been a regular contributor to the Armenian Weekly. He produces a weekly column called “Uncle Garabed's Notebook,” in which he presents an assortment of tales, anecdotes, poems, riddles, and trivia; for the past 10 years, each column has contained a deconstruction of an Armenian surname. He believes his greatest accomplishment in life, and his contribution to the Armenian nation, has been the espousing of Aghavni, and the begetting of Antranig and Lucine.
CK Garabed

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