Self Incrimination
Lives of great men oft remind us
As we o’er their pages turn,
That we too may leave behind us
Letters that we ought to burn.
…Thomas Hood
Folk Saying
History proves that war is better at abolishing nations than nations are at abolishing wars.
The Bear and the Teakettle
Said of a person who injures himself by foolish rage. The story is that one day a bear entered a hut in Kamschatka, where a kettle was on the fire. Master Bruin smelt at it and burnt his nose; greatly irritated, he seized it with his paws, and squeezed it against his breast. This, of course, made matters worse, for the boiling water scalded him terribly, and he growled in agony till some neighbors put an end to his life with their guns.
Classified Ad
The gentleman who kicked the lady at the show last evening seeks forgiveness. He was too dumbfounded to offer an apology at the time. Be assured Madame that he is not in the habit of kicking women—especially when his wife is present.
…Sioux Falls Argus-Leader
Daffy-nition
Nurse: A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.
Armenian Proverb
Alcohol in the glass is tame; in the stomach, it’s wild.
What’s in a Name?
Shahbegian: Persian and Kurdish in derivation, identified as terms of royalty, shah is defined as king in Persian, and beg is defined as feudal lord in Kurdish.
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