Uncle Garabed’s Notebook (July 7, 2012)

Quality of Life

Men do not care how nobly they live, but only how long, although it is within the reach of every man to live nobly, but within no man’s power to live long.

… Seneca


English Proverb

The three learned professions live by roguery on the three parts of man: the doctor mauls our bodies, the parson starves our souls, and the lawyer ensnares our minds.


Stone Soup

The story goes that a beggar asked alms at a lordly mansion, but was told by the servants that they had nothing to give him. “Sorry for it,” said the man, “but will you let me boil a little water to make some soup of this stone?” This was so novel a proceeding, that the curiosity of the servants was aroused, and the man was readily furnished with a saucepan, water, and a spoon. In he popped the stone, and begged for a little salt and pepper for flavoring. Stirring the water and tasting it, he said it would be the better for any fragments of meat and vegetables they might happen to have. These were supplied, and ultimately he asked for a little ketchup or other sauce. When ready the servants tasted it, and declared that “stone soup” was excellent.


The Adman Sez

He who has a thing to sell

And goes and whispers in a well,

Is not so apt to get the dollars

As he who climbs a tree and hollers.


Till Death Do Us Part

The orchestra manager looked over the applicant, and observed his dark curly hair and his carefully trimmed moustache.  “And what was your previous occupation?” he asked.

“I was an organist.”

“Why did you give that up?”

“The monkey died.”


What’s in a Name?

Diradourian/Deradourian: Armenian in derivation, identified as a descriptive term, Diradour is defined as gift of God, given by the Lord.


CK Garabed

Weekly Columnist
C.K. Garabed (a.k.a. Charles Kasbarian) has been active in the Armenian Church and Armenian community organizations all his life. As a writer and editor, he has been a keen observer of, and outspoken commentator on, political and social matters affecting Armenian Americans. He has been a regular contributor to the Armenian Reporter and the AGBU Literary Quarterly, “ARARAT.” For the last 30 years, Garabed has been a regular contributor to the Armenian Weekly. He produces a weekly column called “Uncle Garabed's Notebook,” in which he presents an assortment of tales, anecdotes, poems, riddles, and trivia; for the past 10 years, each column has contained a deconstruction of an Armenian surname. He believes his greatest accomplishment in life, and his contribution to the Armenian nation, has been the espousing of Aghavni, and the begetting of Antranig and Lucine.

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