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Uncle Garabed’s Notebook (Dec. 24, 2016)

Doctor’s Adage

Without pains,
No gains.

Thomas Fuller, Gnomologia, 1735

 Double Entendre

A haughty matron was looking at a proof of a photograph of her that had just been taken at a swank photography studio. “This is an outrage,” she exclaimed; “now I ask you, does this picture look like me?” The suave photographer replied, “Madam, the answer is in the negative.”

An Acute Observation

So many Armenian organizations bestow awards on prominent individuals in order to honor themselves.

From the Word Lab

He wears a Wooden Sword: Said of a person who rejects an offer at the early part of the day, and sells the article at a lower price later on. A euphemism for a fool; the fools or jesters were furnished with wooden swords.

Coal Miner’s Maxim

It’s not the cough that carries you off,
It’s the coffin they carry you off in.

Omni-herbivores

Customer: Say, waiter, these flowers on the table look artificial.
Waiter: That’s the worst of running a vegetarian restaurant; if we use real flowers, the customers eat them.

 What’s in a Name?

Azmelian revisited: Arabic in derivation, identified as a descriptive title, aziz is defined as glorious, and melik as king; therefore, glorious king.

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